I’m the kind of person who doesn’t stop until it works. Whether it’s code or connection, I push. I fix. I restart. Today, I fixed Konekt. Yesterday, I met someone. And suddenly… it’s not just bugs I’m debugging — it’s loneliness too.
💭 Table of Contents
- 🧯 The System Was Down
- 💻 I Don’t Just Fix Code
- 🫂 I Met Someone
- 💡 This Is What “Being Okay” Feels Like
🧯 The System Was Down
Konekt wasn’t working. Something broke. And when it breaks, *I break a little too*. Not because I’m weak — but because I built this thing from nothing. It’s mine. So when it fails, it feels like I failed.
- I panicked — not because of errors, but because I care
- I rewrote things fast, with no sleep, no second thoughts
- I don’t ask for help — I fix it myself
If you’ve ever built something that carries your heart, you know what I mean. This isn’t just a site. It’s me.
💻 I Don’t Just Fix Code
I’ve been fixing things my whole life — my reactions, my silence, my expectations. I don’t break loud. I break inward. Quietly. But this time, I didn’t collapse. I created.
- I didn’t cry. I coded.
- I didn’t rant to anyone. I solved it.
- I didn’t post a meltdown. I posted an update.
Maybe that’s strength. Or maybe that’s me pretending again. I don’t know. But it worked.
🫂 I Met Someone
Yesterday was different. I met someone. It wasn’t deep. It wasn’t dramatic. We just… talked. We laughed. We chatted. And it made me forget, for a second, how empty my notifications usually feel.
- 🥹 A real person. Who replied. Who stayed.
- 💬 It wasn’t forced. It was light. But it meant something.
- 🌱 Maybe that’s how healing starts — small, random, honest
I don’t want to overthink it. I just want to feel it.
💡 This Is What “Being Okay” Feels Like
I’m not saying I’m healed. Or that this day is perfect. But something’s working. Konekt is alive. I’m alive. And someone out there is typing back.
- My systems are online
- My mind is calm — for now
- My heart? Still unsure. But… curious.
I fix things. I break sometimes. But I never stop rebuilding — myself, my work, my world. And today, all three are still here. And maybe that’s enough.
